I Dream of A Past that Broke My Heart

Photo not mine
One late afternoon, while sleeping beside my baby, I'm in a dreamland. It's not a fantasy where a princess meet her prince. It is a dream of my past relationship. I guess, you wonder what I am talking about but if you read between the lines, you'll understand.

I have a past relationship that lasted for 15 years. Within that period, I thought the man will never look for a third-party relationship, again. I use my heart instead of my head. Well, most of the time. I never listened even if he's named as the "Battalion Playboy". But, I was wrong! He had a relationship with a 14-year old teen girl.  Three forecaster told me that he had a relationship with another girl, but I am not listening. I pretend to believe.

Yes, our relationship starts to shake from small arguments that becomes a heated one. That little arguments made me wonder why. One of my neighbors knew about it. His cousin's wife knew about it, too. The most painful part is my brother and his family knew about it. The teen girl worked in my brother's house as a helper. I am not sure if my parents knew it too. I am the ONLY one who doesn't know about it.I  knew all about it in my mother's wake last 2008. We separate year 2006 by creating an alibi and arrived here in Manila. Fortunately, I found work and another man. I promised myself, that I'll never return to him.  I think I am na├»ve or just overlook his movements. I'm busy with my work in an internet shop. That's in the province. My job's affected and I lost it. It's a long story to tell.

As a woman, I believe in intuition. We can sense but I am blind to see the real thing. But, I always dream of a teen girl with the man in my previous relationship. In that dream, I' m battling with a dragon helplessly. While, they are sitting together and looking at me, laughing. When I woke up, I asked why there's no help.

Now, I build a new life together with the new man in my life and our son. But, I dream, again, of the past. I saw this teen girl vividly with a man. I am not sure if that man is the same man I left or the man in my life now. In my dream, I feel the pain and cried, "Not again!. This is my second chance, please don't take it from me!"

Is the past, haunting me? Why am I dreaming this, again?

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